Commentary: Matt’s Lessons From Dad

Jackie’s Commentary —

5. Atheism

Ugh. Heartbreaking. As a parent, if any of my boys grew up in our home with our faith-based beliefs and then realized all they’ve learned was Atheism, I’d cry for days. We have seasons of hardship and funk in our home, parenting is definitely the most difficult task I’ve ever fallen into, but I hope ultimately we display the love, grace, compassion, fullness of the Gospel through our words, actions, relationships, and demeanor. I feel like I’m about to launch into prayer warrior mode and listen to Whitney Houson’s Greatest Love of All. My father believes in God – in a deep and meaningful way. I’ve never seen him without his cross necklace, he insisted we pray during big holidays, he doesn’t like anything pertaining to witchcraft or the evils of the supernatural. When I left for Basic Training, he gave me my own cross necklace. When my mom and I went to see Passion of the Christ (mostly to pick it apart, maybe to mock it), my dad refused to go with us. I think he was really hurt by many of the conclusions my mom and I came to about Christianity. But I always get this feeling that he’s really proud of me for believing in God, and I think he enjoys when he spends time with my family and we pray and we talk openly about what God is doing in our lives. I hope, one day, my dad is able to be more bold in his faith. And I hope that he’s able to love the Jesus of the Bible as much as he loves God. I that’s always been his biggest hang-up.

4. The Same Old Thing Every Day

This was totes my dad, too. Same old thing, all the days. I share in Matt’s whimsy and cravings for new and exciting. But, yes. These days, I am really thankful for consistency. I’m thankful for routine. I actually like doing the same old thing every day. But with the occasional impromptu hang out, hike, late night drive, walk-about the city. Honestly, I need the consistency, or I start getting selfish in my actions where I’m just like: “I’mma do me and y’all can judge but y’all can’t stand in my way, so BACK UP!” I think it gets harder to do that with multiple kids.

 3. Stay Quiet And Never Speak Up

I learned this from my mother, ironically. She is not the type to back down or to stay quiet. She is a powerhouse of a woman and incredibly intimidating. But she was of thought that children can be seen, but shouldn’t be heard. And I felt like a lost, maybe-invisible child of the world until my late 20’s. As adults, we really love and respect each other. Changing the thought patterns of passive-aggressive behavior is no simple thing and not for the faint of heart. The perseverance for something like that has to be a God thing. Matt went Beast Mode getting to where he is now. Cheers, bro.

2. Slappin’ Da Bass

Bassist are always the funnest ones to watch on any stage. They’re always so chill. It doesn’t matter how crazy or intense the music gets, they’re able to just groove and appreciate it all coming together. At least, that’s how I imagine it to be.

1. A Love For Music

My dad was all about the music, as well. I started borrowing his tape cassettes and then his C.D.’s at a young age and would spend hours in my room listening to music. He taught me how to be in the music; immerse, appreciate, feel, think about, enjoy. That past three years have been pretty dry of music. I think it’s affected the way I think and process things somehow. Like, I don’t think as much as I did when I listened to music or played an instrument? Maybe I’m just making crap up.

Jeremy’s Commentary –

5. Atheism

My early church-going experience was very similar to Matt’s, very legalistic and rule-centric. I am not sure why, but it never chased me into atheism. Somehow I stuck with Christianity thing, even though I got became very disillusioned. I don’t really know what role me dad played in all this, but I’m sure he’s in there somewhere. My dad has always been faithful and curious, and I’m sure that has rubbed off on me.

4. The Same Old Thing Every Day

As I mentioned above, my dad is faithful. He faithfully worked at what I would say is a boring job. He was a salesman. It was great for him as he is quite the people person. But it still must have  been tedious. I can only guess about that, because he rarely if ever showed it. He’d get up and day and leave the house and drive around selling people ad-space in the phone book, and he’d come home as chipper and congenial as ever. The things that made him most frustrated were the activities that deviated from the daily grind. I have only one-tenth the stability of my dad.

3. Stay Quiet And Never Speak Up

It me and dad as well. Talking about our opinions, much less our feelings, hasn’t been easy. We’ve never been complete clams, but we also haven’t been peacocks. We’ve gotten better, but it’s still an issue. Just ask our wives.

2. Slappin’ Da Bass


Dad never slapped da bass. He did/does blow into the harmonica, and that has inspired me. I bought one a couple years back, and started playing it. But I’m lazy/unmotivated so I quickly gave up. For my dad’s most recent birthday (a couple weeks ago) I bought him a new mouth harp. He was super ecstatic about it. Maybe I should start blowing into mine again.

1. A Love For Music


More on this later.


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