5. Yasmine Bleeth via Baywatch:
Pamela Anderson. Get a VHS tape. Pass.
Carmen Electra. Watch a workout video. Pass.
Yasmine Bleeth was the only Baywatch beauty I ever had eyes for. The brunette. This is no surprise. Brunettes were always the ones I would pick out of a crowd. You can have Marilyn, I’ll take Audrey. On the off chance I actually see a rerun of Baywatch, Yasmine Bleeth is still the only good thing about that show. I still have no idea how I got away with watching this show when I was young. But I did and Yasmine always shot me that smile and she had me. She can rescue me any time.
Oh, by the way, Yasmine, I am glad you kicked the cocaine. I wish you sobriety for the rest of your life.
4. Elisabeth Shue via Adventures in Babysitting:
If you watched Adventures in Babysitting and told me that you didn’t understand my youthful infatuation with Elisabeth Shue, I would simply ask: “Did you not see the first five minutes of that film?” How could anyone not fall in love? She was adorable, smart and sassy. I would totally give up my man card to have her defend me against a gang member and tell him, “Don’t. ****. with the babysitter.!” She’s got chops. Every boy’s dream babysitter. I can’t tell you how many times I watched this film and fell in love all over again each time. Hell, if I watched it again now, I would probably fall for her again…though it would be much creepier.
3. Elizabeth Vargas via ABC News:
Elizabeth Vargas single-handedly made a middle-school boy care about the news. I used to get up extra early to watch the ABC morning show where she would do the “actual” news segment. Every weekday morning, it was 10 minutes of pure bliss. And I actually learned something about the world I lived in in the process. I don’t know about you, but I say that’s a pretty damn good deal.
Oh, by the way, Elizabeth, I am glad you kicked the alcohol. I wish you sobriety for the rest of your life.
2. Keri Russell via The Mickey Mouse Club:
Man, Kerri never has lost it. Sure, I lost touch with her during the Felicity years, because that show wasn’t my steez–too busy watching the last bit of 90210 and Party of Five with my sister (oh, yeah, totally different types of shows, trust me). But as soon as she showed up in We Were Soldiers and MI:3, those old feelings came back. It was like seeing that ex-girlfriend that you never quite got over after 5 years and going home to reassess where you went wrong with your life to let that one go. Man, writing this makes me want to watch Felicity just so I can see what was up during those unknown years. Sheesh.
1. Marisa Tomei from My Cousin Vinny to eternity…:
Marisa Tomei had my heart then and she still has it now. If you want me to see the worst movie ever made, put Marisa Tomei in it and I will be the first in line. Forget that she was nearly 20 years older than me. That sure as hell didn’t matter then and it doesn’t matter now. However, back then it was all about the prepubescent love…now it’s because I think she is a terrific actress who has done some great work in her career. And she is still gorgeous. Marisa Tomei will always be my number one crush.